Writing May 28, 2008

I just realized I have been writing here for over 2 years!  I went back and read some of the old stuff today. Amazing how quickly it all comes back.  I enjoy writing.  While I am very aware of the public aspect of this space, I still feel it is a great outlet.  I need that, I always have. I started journaling a LONG LONG time ago.  I remember arguing with both a friend and my foster sister over separate incidents where they each read my journal and were upset over what I wrote.  Of course I was 12 then   Now I currently have 4 journals going:  this one, one for each kid, and one of my own.  Each is very different.  This one is me being aware of who can, is and may some day read this.  I started the journals for Supergirl and Boomer a year and a half ago.  Every few months (sometimes less sometimes more) I write a little update about things they are doing, how much I love them, and what our life is like right now.  I really enjoy writing in those, I can talk to the grown up versions of them, let them know my hopes and fears.  Then I have my own journal.  I still have all of mine, even back to when I was 12.  They have been through a lot of good and bad times. I am much better at writing then talking.  It helps get all of the junk and funk out of my head.  I have realized I tend to write when I am in a funk, so if a stranger were to read it I would probably look like a very unhappy person.  Which really isn’t true, it’s just where I get all of that stuff out.  I don’t know…  It just helps.  So what do you do?  Do you even have funk, and if so, how do you get it out?

Spring Pictures May 25, 2008

Hanging out on the front porch

Playing with the neighbor’s dog

My very beautiful children

An entire year has passed… May 24, 2008

First Day of School

Last Day of School

First Dance Class

Last Dance Class

I am sad

How’s Boomer? May 20, 2008

Just thought I’d write a little update on Boomer (now that I have some time on my hands):

• Speech:  at 12 months the doctor was concerned about his speech and had him evaluated, it was determined he was not delayed enough to qualify for service.  Since that time…Holy Cow, has this boy ever started talking.  I don’t have any idea how many words he knows, it’s a lot.  He likes to name things.  No sentences yet, just LOTS of labeling.  He will try to say anything you ask, it’s very cute!  The doctor was quite impressed with his progress at his checkup last week.
• Letters:  He has developed an interest in letters. At first every letter was E!!!!  He would get so excited and yell it everytime he noticed a letter.   Supergirl thinks it’s so funny.   He has now expanded to E!!  O!!! D!!! and G!!! although there is no correlation between what he says and what he points at.
• Music:  He definitely LOVES music and has a very good ear for it.  He started singing twinkle twinkle a long time ago (with no words) then baa baa black sheep.  He will listen to a song and sing la la or dada to the tune.   The funniest is frere jacques, he sings that in the car.
• Temper:  The boy definitely has one.  He gets very mad very fast.  He hits kicks screams and most recently spits. He came up with that one all on his own.  We can often see it coming and try to avoid them, but use time outs for hitting and other physical aggression.  As busy as he is he will sit for time out. It’s the strangest thing.  However, he seems to know when you are in a place you can’t enforce as easily (grocery store, restaurant, etc) and takes full advantage of these situations.  We don’t eat out much anymore
• Busy:   Yes, he is VERY VERY busy.  He never just sits.   He loves to run, climb, dance, get into things.  He is very hard to keep up with, great exercise! He is fun to watch, such energy is just amazing!  And he is fearless.   Climbing his one of his favorite things to do.
• Pretend:  He is starting to do this and it is so fun.  Supergirl loves to crawl around and pretend she is a dog or cat.  He started doing this with her tonight.  He would alternate between crawling and saying ruff ruff and standing up and calling Supergirl ‘Opy’ which is what he calls our dog Oprah.  It’s so neat to watch him get the concept of pretending.
• Protective:  We have discovered he’s very protective of me.  If Daddy-O and I are goofing around and he thinks Daddy-O might be hurting me (picture a pillow fight) he completely freaks out.  He cries and screams and almost freezes he is so upset. It is heartbreaking, so we have to be very careful.  Even if Supergirl is involved and Daddy-O does the same thing to her and we are all laughing it is suddenly not funny anymore if he does it to me.  Very sad, but it also makes me feel very cared for and protected…

That’s all for tonight.  I plan to download some pictures tomorrow…

*Sigh* May 15, 2008

As of 3:45 today I will be officially finished with everything!!! (and unemployed, but that is quite all right!) 

I have already scheduled Boomer’s 18 month check up for tomorrow, plan to take Supergirl to school and pick her up.  AND  scheduled an appointment for myself in the afternoon for a hair cut and color (bring on the blonde) and to wax my eyebrows.  AND  Daddy-O are going out tomorrow night with his shift from work and have a babysitter. 

BRING ON THE SUMMER

Mother’s Day May 11, 2008

Mother’s Day.  Today began by heading to bed last night with a headache and waking up around 4 with a full-on migraine.  I was out of migraine medicine and not even sure whether it was pure sinus or mostly migraine.  Daddy-O had been in and out all night taking call-ins for work.  So I headed downstairs to take some tylenol and try to sleep on the sofa (to no avail).  Supergirl woke up around 6ish and headed downstairs to hang out with me.  At 7 the two of us headed to Walgreens to pick up my prescription refill.  At this point I was beginning to really feel sorry for myself and thinking the best way to spend the day is to stay in bed, alone, all day.  However, two housr later I was feeling completely better (thank goodness for imitrex) and ready to start the day.

My kids were so incredibly well behaved and wonderful today.  All day I just kept thinking about motherhood.  What an incredible privilege this is.  I remember before I was a mother, how much I wanted to become one, and how little I knew about how much it would change me.  Becoming a mother changed the way I feel about my mother.  I understand how much she loves me and all the sacrifices she made for me.  All that I did not appreciate before.  I have this new bond with her, and I am so thankful for that.

I am also so thankful for my children.  How incredibly awesome are they.  And how lucky am I to be able to be here to watch them grow.  To watch Supergirl as she learns about the world, forms her own friendships, and becomes so confident and independent.  To watch Boomer as he has formed such a strong attachment and trust in us, as he learns to talk (he has learned SO many words lately), and to watch his daily adventures.  He is definitely not one to sit and let life pass him by.  I can’t imagine a better job. I really can’t.  I tend to get caught up in the daily grind and really feel sorry for myself with how busy and stressed we are.  But seriously, life could not be much better.  I love my children more than I ever thought possible.  There is no doubt they have both changed my life and I will cherish every moment as they grow.  I am just so so thankful.

And today my heart is also with Boomer’s birth mother.  She is a part of us.  I pray she is healthy and safe and smoehow has the knowledge in her heart that he is ok, that he is loved and healthy and safe.

Final Countdown May 9, 2008

Class–DONE

Portfolio–DONE, put in the mail today

Internship–4 days left!  Next Thursday is my last day!

Job–Umm….yeah.  This one is still a work in progress.  Just sent in an application yesterday.  Have been considering a different option if I can’t find a school social work job in the very near future.  More on that later.

(expect more posts now, my brain is starting to work again)