It has been 6 months since I have written anything here. Partly because I have lost my definition of this space. It started as a way to share the antics of my children with our family. Facebook now fills that need. Also my kids are older and have a desire for privacy. I no longer write about many of their antics. They seem to frown upon it. So that just leaves me—and in all honesty I am not very comfortable writing much about me. And I am not sure how much of me exists outside of our kids.
And yet… Here I am. Tonight I had a desire to come here and just be in this space. It reminds me of when my kids were little. It reminds me of the time before Facebook. It feels safe and warm and cozy. I am not sure I can ever abandon it forever.
A lot has happened in the past 6 months. The biggest of which is that we adopted again. We now have a newborn and are soaking in every second with him. This time around we registered with the National Down Syndrome Adoption Network. Maybe I will say more about the journey later. But for now I will just say that my heart is full. I am completely in love, not just with this baby, but with my entire family. I could never have imagined this amazing life. When I find myself frozen in fear with the realization that I only get to do this life once I stop and look around. While I doubt myself on an hourly basis, somehow I have no doubts when it comes to our family. I am working on being present in order to soak in every moment of childhood with each of these amazing humans.
Perhaps I will come here more often as this journey continues. Perhaps not, kids keep you busy. Either way it helps me to know it is here. It, too, has become a part of my time in this place.