Today I ran for 25 minutes without walking. That is a big deal. Especially given the fact that when I started in February I would be about of breath after running for just 1 1/2 minutes! I am doing the couch to 5k program (again). I have tried it twice in the past and both times I quit at week 5. I don’t like to run, I dread doing it, always feel out of breath WHILE I am doing it, and my knees and shins would hurt afterword. This time I did it for three weeks in February and then quit. In June I started again, but started on week 3 instead of the beginning. I commited myself. I made it past week 5 which was a HUGE deal! Today I finished week 6. From now on it is 25 minute runs or longer, with no more walking in between. I am very happy.

I am not sure why I am running. I know one reason is I was feeling very fat and lazy. I’m not fat, but I was feeling that way. About 2 1/2 years ago I started gaining weight. I had been the same weight for years, then gotten pregnant and gained 50 pounds, then lost all of that and went back to my original weight. Then Boomer came along 🙂 I do believe adoption weight is much harder to lose than pregnancy weight! I gained 10 pounds a year for over 2 years. I was feeling pretty gross. So in January I did the 30 day shred and lost a few pounds. But after 30 days I was done. In March I tried to do Barry’s bootcamp, but couldn’t really get into it. So now it’s back to running. My thought was simply “runner’s look good.”

I feel SO much better. I am not as lazy, I am getting MUCH more accomplished, I am not as tired, I am in a better mood. This time around I am not as sore and out of breath, I guess that comes with getting in shape. I have lost a few more pounds, not a lot, but that’s quite ok, I FEEL like I look better… I weigh less this summer than I did last summer, which at the very least means the upward climb has stopped.

Part of this obsession is completely emotional. It’s about children…and aging. I am about 95% sure we are done having kids. This is a very depressing thing for me, for a very selfish reason. I am simply sad that I will never experience being pregnant again. It is a sad feeling. I can not begin to imagine those who were never able to have that opportunity. I truly just can’t imagine. Just knowing we are done is hard for me. It makes complete sense and I know it is the right decision, but it still makes me sad… So I am redirecting those feelings in to running. I decided if I am not having any more kids I am going to look like I did BEFORE I had kids 🙂 I am going to LOOK like I am a runner, not a mom. Purely selfish reason to run, but I do feel my family is reaping the benefits, I am happier, which impacts everyone. I do not plan to quit. As soon as I am able to run 3 miles without walking I will start doing 5k’s. I have done them in the past but always with walking and always pretty slow. I want to see what my time would be if I can run the whole time. Who knows, then maybe 10k’s and MAYBE a half marathon—-MAYBE….


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Dawn
    Jul 12, 2010 @ 09:00:11

    Love the new look of your blog! I think it is great that you’re running–I’m so jealous. I did the couch2 5k for 3 weeks but my knee swelled up and I could barely walk–so as much as I want to run–I can’t. So it’s biking for me.

    I agree–adoption weight is hard to lose–I’ve been carrying an extra 30+ pounds around since Noah came home 4 years ago. I feel much better since I’ve been biking, even though there is much more weight to lose.

    Way to Go Sarah. Let’s try to get together one weekend soon.


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